Things I learnt in Alabama
Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.
There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Alabama. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Alabama, plus a couple no one's seen before.
If it grows, it sticks; if it crawls, it bites.
Onced and Twiced are words.
It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
It's not a garden hose or simply a hose, it's a "hosepipe" (one word). Knowed is a word too! (I knowed I wasnt supposed to do that; but I did)
Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.
People actually grow and eat okra. (and like it!)
Mama-nem means the whole family. ("Are mamanem comin?")
There ain't no such thing as "lunch". There's only dinner and then there's supper.
Backards and foreards means I know everything about you.
Jeet? is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat yet?"
You know you're from Alabama if:
1. You measure distance in minutes.
2. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
3. Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.
4. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it, no matter what time of the year.
5. You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I am fixing to go to the store.
6. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car…for your OWN car.
9. You know what "cow tipping" is.
10. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, chili powder, and ketchup. Let’s not forget pepper sauce for the turnip greens!
11. The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require 6 pages…for sports.
12. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
13. You find 90 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm."
14. You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
15. You know whether another Alabamian is from east, west, or middle Alabama as soon as they open their mouth.
16. Visiting Wal-Mart is a favorite pastime known as "going to Wal-Marts."
17. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.
18. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. Example "What kinna coke you want?"
19. Fried Catfish is the other white meat.
20. You understand these jokes.
1 comment:
#20? WHAT DO YOU MEAN JOKES. ALL THAT STUFF IS REAL TO ME.
BEAR
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